If you don't know what to eat

If you don't know what to eat...

Don't Eat, Get starved - till the true desire burns in the heart, and then, the call rings in the mind, and then, you will truly know what is the exact food that you really want, and you'll search it like a mad hunter.

复杂/简单

复杂的东西，背后往往隐藏的，根本不是什么真相，恐怕只是一片乱象。像一个互相牵扯纠缠不清的线条网，聪明人总想动手拨弄尝试厘清，最后不小心落进了大网内，不得翻身也未必自知。所以选择简单，但是“也许简单，还是一样地难...” -卢广仲《寂寞考》

简单，不见得就容易...

电影人性

世界之大，无奇不有。而现今的电影，往往能把许多或许我们比较难接触到的各种世象栩栩如生地展现出来。战争、走私贩毒、黑帮社会、人口贩卖、政府官僚勾结、国与国之间的利益牵涉牵动数万人的命运等等，使我们面对恶势力面对死亡和痛苦不再陌生。看着上千万人在战场上厮杀阵亡，一具具的尸体，也不再唤起我们的怜悯之心。然后有人说，这些活生生的现实我们不得不承认，它的存在我们必须认同，然后，慢慢地，我们由认同不自觉地变成赞同。

在侦探电影里，最戏剧化的梗，在于最后揭露你最相信的人，或许就是最大的坏蛋。他可能是力求打击罪犯的探员的上司，可能是你所崇敬的医生或老师，可能是你最好的朋友，可能是你最深爱的情人。你越是死都相信他是清白的人，他就越坏得难看，通过这种手法拨动你的神经线，刺激到你，这就有impact，就成功了。于是，久而久之，我们也学会了一开场，就在东猜西猜，总之主角身边的人不管三七二十一，逐一怀疑。然后，电影散了，回到真实的世界里时，我们理解了人性的丑相，对身边的人也开始抱着怀疑，又如何纯粹地相信善良、情义？

这是一个价值混乱的年代。

“失去的人性，还能不能再找回来？”-Human Trafficking

Something to look forward to

In the movie "The Taking of Pelham 123", the professional negotiator asked whether the criminals say what they are going to do if the ransom is not given within the time given, and Garber said yes, they are going to kill someone in the train. And the negotiator said that's good because that means the criminals are looking forward to the future.

One must have something to look forward to in order to live on.

V is coming to town this weekend. He has got a new camera and we'd looking forward to go on a photography trip. I still do not know where to go and haven't got any idea what should we shoot. Sunrise and sunset is a bit boring. Should we set a theme then? Like the newspaper always do.

B has returned from her studies in Taiwan and she's got me a new book. A book that I've read a little about it and I liked it instantly. It's about filming but it's not the "How to Make a Digital Film" stereotype kind, where they show you step-by-step from pre to post-production. The author look at the film industry in his very own unique way, which is more personalized and humanized, and I thought this is nice.

And of course, must watch the much anticipated "OVERHEARD" in the cinemas.

K sent me a song - "Falling slowly" (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FkFB8f8bzbY). Amazing song with lyrics that touch your heart. I know you are there, and I've heard you. :)

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You'll make it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along

Soon later I found out that it is the soundtrack of "ONCE", a film that I've missed. Now that I've listened to the song, it made me want to watch the film even more.

The Curious Incident of the Red Ant in July

It's been some time... that I do not know what's going on in my head, and what's going on with me. It's been some time, I feel like not talking to anyone. I thought people might not be listening after all. I read from the papers, there is a name for this condition -- xxxx.

Few weeks ago, when I was facing the computer screen, I had a strange feeling in my body. I felt like vomiting, as in literally, physically. And there are times where there is an urge to stay away from the computer. I didn't hate it, and the computer didn't irritate me, but my body seems to tell me that way. I talked to a friend who also uses the computer frequently, and she told me, there is a name for this condition too -- yyyy. Then, she advises me to keep away from the computer for a while.

I decided to take her advice. I took a week off from my work. I spent a day painting my room into airy blue. I had a thorough workout, even my palms and fingers ached after that, besides my whole body. But the feeling is way much better than facing the computer. I felt calmer and my mind became quieter, and now I love sleeping in my bedroom.

Since I couldn't work and didn't wish to talk or connect to the others, the simplest thing was to read or to watch a dvd movie. I preferred reading because it can wash away more of your time easily. I started to read Mitch Albom's "ONE MORE DAY". It was really an inspirational and moving story. What encourages me the most was that I manage to finish the book in a week. It's not great, but because I think I'd never read an English story book since "Jack and Jane" (ooh no, it's "Peter and Jane" and think they have a dog called "Jack") in the primary school and maybe "Enid Blyton" in the secondary school (I've read some self-improvement/ inspirational English books though), this is something different to me. I've attempted a few times to read an English book but the stories were always not interesting enough to keep me reading. Therefore, I feel a little happy in my heart with this little achievement. Thus, I went on with the second book called "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time".

I like Christopher Boone in the story. I like the way he would always say what he likes and what he doesn't like. I like the thought of how prime numbers are like life. They are very logical but you could never work out the rules, even if you spent all your time thinking about them. Many times, he also makes me laugh. Oopss.. Christopher doesn't like people laughing at him. :p

Because Christopher is a superbly logical person, he would calm himself by giving himself a mathematic problem and solving it. When your mind is occupied by something challenging, but not very complicated that you know you'll be able to handle it, you would feel a little more calmer. Thus maybe when you cannot sort things out, you would have to write it down. Or, keep reading and reading because reading keeps your mind occupied too. I figured that I am not a logical person, so this way may suit me well. This is also why mom would wonder why didn't I fall asleep when reading because she would, and I would wonder why she could keep herself awake and energetic with Sudoku. You might think it is stupid to have established a connection with a fake character in a book, but hey, people also like the fake Spiderman and children like the fake ugly purple cartoon character too (with a very uncute name called Teletoby).

I have many good friends around me. They are really good ones, they are always optimistic and lively. Seeing them makes me smile. So I didn't like the idea of acting strangely or weirdly when I am with them, then I would have see them becoming upset too. I like seeing them happy. H called me the other day since two months ago. He has always called up to ask "how are you"... that is very warm, but still... I didn't want to talk about myself.

So that is why, maybe I was not talking to K face-to-face, but through the virtual space, so I blurted out to her... @#*&(%@)! Because I couldn't see her emotion and reaction, I do not know whether is is right or wrong. But, some friends are truly understanding and forgiving, K is certainly one of them, and so she didn't made me feel that I was strange or weird. And I thanked her for that.

I have no future plans at the moment because it is stupid to have fake pictures in your head about what has not happened (as Christopher said). It's like it could be a sunny day, a rainy day, or half sunny and half rainy day, or half sunny and half cloudy day, and the possibilities go endless so you would end up frustrating yourself. But I would read the following book, which is "Tuesdays with Morrie" and maybe I'll change my mind and write something else. Maybe I would be determined to be a lecturer after I read the book, or maybe, not.